To the 30something trad baddie at church today with the dark hair, wrist tattoos, chunky black boots, and the passel of unruly 5-and-unders: heyyy! clearly you and I have some things in common, like for one, we both believe in the One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church, but, umm, do you also believe in Platonic love at first sight? Is it just me, or is the feeling mutual? I was eyeing you during Mass in my peripheral, distracted by your incredible vibe, fantasizing about us talking for hours, swapping our secrets and recipes, giggling like preteens, yapping about the tradwife life, commiserating sometimes, maybe shopping for modest church dresses and homeschool curricula together, babysitting for each other, just helping each other get through it… maybe one day we’ll even be godmothers to each others’ kids?!? Idk, maybe it could be me & you against this world and we’ll live happily ever after? So like, do you already have a bff, orrrr….? Check yes or no. Or not. It’s cool. Nvm.