CAUTION: CONTAINS SPOILERS for Ultimate Baking Championship!!

Where to even begin, with this show?! This was a whirwind. I dunno about you guys, but I felt kind of overloaded. Here are my thoughts, and a quick recap:

I’ll start with this: I miss Spring Baking Championship. I wish they’d just done another season of that instead. This show… the set is so sleek. The pastel colors, the contestants’ humble oohing and ahhing, their friendly banter, and Jesse’s corny jokes, are all missing. This is just all business, no frills. It’s not really the kind of baking show I like. But, neither was Next Gen, and that one managed to pleasantly surprise me, so we’ll see where this goes.

Also, starting with sixteen?! And sending home six in a single episode?! Whew! I get being cutthroat, but this was wild, wasn’t it?

The prize money is 50k, not just 25. So this is all professional, high-end stuff. No self-taught home bakers on this show. Food was described as “sexy” not once, but twice. All the desserts are these fancy, elaborate, highly technical little plated numbers with about twenty-seven elements in each – things you’d only find at places I could never afford to go, and honestly wouldn’t care to even if I could. (I’ve been watching these shows since like 2017, and even I have no clue what “pain de gênes” is.) Give me a good hearty slice of cake over any of these, any day. For me, it’s just kinda… blah.

One thing I do like about it though: best believe, no one on this show mispronounces “mascarpone.” Not a single time! (Although, I did catch Chris calling a cylinder a “sphere” one time. I can forgive that, because I too am a scatterbrain, and his blueberry lemon chiffon cake sounded delicoius.)

The other thing I like about this show: the leaderboard. I’ve been saying for some time that these shows really oughtta have a numerical ranking system, to make it a little more technical and less vague. I appreciated this move.

The Curse of Mith’s Favorite strikes again… three times. From the get-go, I was rooting for Steven and Cesar. And Julian, I liked him a lot because his flavor choices in both challenges sounded the most delicious (that campfire swiss roll tho!)! What is it about me?! Why is my support the kiss of death, for these contestants? I’m like the grim reaper disguised as a cheerleader! (Last season of Holiday was an anomaly.) If I had to guess in socionics terms, it’s because of my Ni base function. I have a strong intuition, purportedly, so I think I can kind of subconsciously sense which people are the underdogs, and my heart goes out to them.

And even weirder – both Steven and Cesar went home on eclairs! WTH! NO ONE else on this show better be making any eclairs for the REST OF THE SEASON! Especially my favorites (I’m not gonna say who they are now, lest I curse them too!).

Without naming any favorites: I’m thrilled that Adalberto pulled through after his napoleon fell apart. My little heart was breaking for him. He seems so genuine, and also, his pastry shop back home is the coolest! I’m also glad to see Clement back – he was one of my favs on his season of Spring Baking, and I remember the last time he made that fraisier. (“I didn’t sleep for three years” after not winning that show, he said, lol – but now he’s back, and out for blood!) And Robert – where do I recognize him from?! I know I’ve seen him on one of these shows before.

I did think it was a bit of a cruel dig when Duff referred to Molly’s gateau as “the work of a cold, calculating assassin” – right after sending Cesar, the eponymous Pastry Assassin, home! Come on now! And sending the “Flavor Queen” Lasheeda home on flavor?! And he told Julian that his Swiss roll needed “lube”?! OUCH! Merciless! The judging was harsh! I got a bit of whiplash going straight into this after the soft and gentle Next Gen, didn’t you?! Whew!

Anyway, here’s the recap:

Skills Challenge – four basic tastes, four basic textures; randomly assigned

Sour & Smooth

• Robert: deconstructed key lime pie (“you ain’t sending me home on a key lime pie!”)
• Adalberto: date pudding cake w/ passionfruit curd

Bitter & Toasty

• Clement: chocolate hazelnut tart with coffee mascarpone cream
• Rochelle: chocolate mousse w/ liquid pecan praline center & toasted marshmallow

Salty & Sticky

• Casey: chocolate peanut caramelized tart
• Steven: praline eclair

Sweet & Crunchy

• Florencia: ricotta-pear deconstructed tart
• Sarah: honey mascarpone almond mousse w/ caramel tuile

Salty & Smooth

• Molly: miso caramel namelaka
• Juan: coffee chocolate mousse cake w/ arequipe

Sour & Sticky

• Lasheeda: deconstructed rocky road w/ raspberry
• Chris: lemon almond cake w/ cinnamon-vanilla milk jam & yuzu

Bitter & Crunchy

• Arlety: chocolate orange hazelnut financier w/ kumquat
• Cesar: meyer lemon eclair w/ honeycomb brittle

Sweet & Toasty

• Julian: chocolate toasted hazelnut petit gateau w/ brownie
• Oralia: toasted sesame crème brulee w/ toasted sesame shortbread

Challenge Winners: Molly (18/20), Juan (17/20), Clement (16/20), Adalberto (15/20)

Sent Home: Steven, Sarah, Lasheeda, Cesar

Master Challenge: a dessert that represents a defining event in your life

• Casey: key lime pie w/ honey meringue
• Juan: tropical coconut fruit tart w/ mongo mongo
• Florencia: almond genoise w/ cherries, chocolate mousse, & espresso liqueur
• Clement: his signature fraisier
• Julian: s’mores devil’s food cake swiss roll
• Oralia: caramelized apple charlottte
• Rochelle: bananas foster torte
• Robert: milk chocolate hazelnut bar w/ cherry chantilly
• Molly: white chocolate pistachio gateau w/ raspberry
• Arlety: tropical tart
• Adalberto: guava & coconut napoleon w/ figs
• Chris: blueberry lemon chiffon cake

Challenge Winner: Molly (27/30)

Sent Home: Arlety & Julian

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Episode One Winner: Molly

Superlatives from the judges: 1 (“best group of bakers I have ever seen” – Duff)

Dead family members mentioned: 1 (Florencia’s mom 🙏😔) – very sad, but it’s also kind of a trope that these contestants have a dead family member inspiring them, so I thought I’d keep a tally this season

Duff’s gaping maw spotted: 2 times (have y’all noticed how the camera loves to zoom in on his face when he’s taking a big bite and his eyes are wide open? As someone who hates to be seen eating, I’m always so painfully embarrassed for him, lol – they do this to him all the time, so I thought I’d keep a tally of this this season as well)

The dessert that I would most have liked to eat: there were SO many to choose from, but probably Robert’s from the second challenge: milk chocolate hazelnut “bar” with that “sexy,” “ethereal” cherry chantilly

Mith’s official prediction for the finalists and winner: Clement, Juan, and Robert, with Juan being the champion

What were your thoughts?! Who are your favs? Which desserts did you want to eat?! Leave me your comments! I’m sending this to the internet in hopes of reaching fellow fans. I want to hear from you!